The “discovery” that led to D-Day 1


A simple phone number/email address written on a piece of paper, in the front seat of my trailblazer. I may have not ever laid eyes on it had I not decided to go to a 7/11 and get a soda. I was confused when I saw it because it made no sense; she wasn’t in school and she had no reason to email ANYTHING to ANY of her coworkers (no reason that I could fathom at the time). She had been using her phone excessively that day, and when I started to think about it she always sat, or turned the phone, so that I couldn’t see the screen. Anyways, I logged in to her email and didn’t see any unusual incoming traffic; I looked at her sent items and saw the most recent recipient had a strange email address.

That email address was a combination of her initials and the month and day of her birth. The attachments in that email were pictures of her in “sexy clothing”. Later in the evening she put the kids to bed and left her phone down stairs, so while she was with the kids I got on her phone and opened up her email app; no mystery account there. I opened the internet browser on her phone; bingo. What I saw after that was horrifying; reading the emails from men around our area trying to have sex with her, and her responses trying to do the same. I sent an email to that account from mine, something to the effect of “Hi, this is your husband, who is Shawn?”. I couldn’t wait, I let her kow that I knew while she was still upstairs. She didn’t come down for about 15 minutes.

I forgot about this phone number until I saw that bRaving had thrown some stuff away, and this was right on top. This one hurt extra special because it was a Marine in Camp Lejeune, 4 hours south of us. I work with and see Marines 5 days a week. I had his name from the emails, and with that information it wouldn’t take more than 15 minutes to find him after I got back to work. Maybe not literally his room, but that isn’t what I meant; he knew she was married and still pursued her, which is a violation of 2 articles of the UCMJ, which I also informed him, and that I could forward a neatly packaged gathering of evidence to his battalion commander. Why bother with company level, the real punishment starts at battalion, and regimental would be too high.

Anyways, we are struggling financially, still, but we have a better idea of what we are capable of and not capable of financially. We are arguing about the money a little bit. I feel like my perception of her intent is different than what she means, but lately it feels as if everybody is up my ass about everything, her included, and it makes me feel about as capable as a 2 year old. She keeps talking about pushing me to do things that are uncomfortable, but I don’t think she fully appreciates the person I’ve evolved in to since last year.

I don’t like being pushed because I don’t feel like I’m being given the time or space to emotionally deal with whatever it is that is causing me stress, and getting pushed in to action before I’m ready just makes it worse for me, not better.

We are also stressed due to the amount of classwork we have. She has 2 graduate level courses, I have 2 undergrad, and I just started 3 additional undergrad courses.

We are dealing with it fairly well. Arguments aren’t fights, we don’t go to bed angry or upset with each other, and we had some really hot sex the other night. Started moving stuff in to the storage unit so we can get the house ready to sell.

“I am the Master of my fate; I am the Captain of my soul.”

4 responses to “The “discovery” that led to D-Day 1

  1. finding the “proof” is hard not just because of what it symbolizes but because it gives us too much detail, I collected information over a long period of time to be sure of my wife’s affair sadly i remember every text, every email and every response. We remain together nearly a year on but it haunts me every day. Stay well regards “I”

    • Oddly enough, I HAD to have all of the info. I was literally killing myself imagining her having sex with the men, imaging her getting hot and horny on her way to see them, imagining her getting excited at the thought of me offering to take the kids out of town for not just one, but two weekends in a row to give her space to decompress in. The thoughts, images and “movies” going through my head were worse than reality, and knowing every single detail down to how long they stayed in what position and what the lighting in the room was like made it have less of an impact, because it was no longer an UNKNOWN, and it didn’t have anymore power over me. I must’ve hid the posts detailing that, I know I’ve written a few on that topic.

      • sorry to be honest I have only just found your blog so may not have got back that far, I felt the same, I needed to know everything i didn’t feel i could decide what to do next without knowing I don’t regret finding out but I still wish the memories were not in my head. I read the back story some more, regards “I”

      • Nothing to apologize for, I was thinking out loud when I said I wrote some posts but they were probably still hidden. Glad to meet you and I look forward to reading yours!

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