Happy Birthday Marines

Go get drunk, cause trouble, employ a condom, hold the door for the ladies, compose yourself before speaking to the children who will be in awe of you, don’t drink and drive, and leave your NCO sword (if you have one) in your fucking hotel room.  

Image—if you see someone pull this out in a tense situation, run or join his/her side of the argument.  


Don’t forget to watch the Commandant’s birthday message, and then get knifehanded at the end by the person who banned knife-hands in the Marine Corps.  It’s actually really motivating, so if you are a civilian, I’m knife-handing the monitor and telling you to watch it anyway.  You can’t argue with 238 years of ass-kicking awesome.  


If you EVER have the opportunity to attend a Marine Corps Ball, fucking take it.  You will love it, if only because you get to watch dudes in dress blues make epic asses of themselves while powered by alcohol and cake, after watching them do some nice drill during a ceremony.  



7 responses to “Happy Birthday Marines

  1. I love a man in uniform. And yes, the Marine’s win it hands down, dress blues, or Navy whites and the Air Force dress uniform -cake and alcohol, makes for a very yummy night. Sorry Army, you need new fashion designers (wink).

    • There is so much history in the uniform, you wouldn’t believe it (whether it is true or not, it’s what they teach, at least since 2002 when I went through basic). The blood stripe, the 7 trouser belt loops (debatable), the quatrefoil, the NCO sword, and the stiff collar. The only thing that bothers me is that the swords, minus the point, are dull 😦

      • I participated in a Marine wedding once, I got a good close up taking pictures of the swords against the brides bottom. I can see your disapointment, they’re no longer having much purpose. I have seen some shows, and those are very cool.

      • Funny you mention not having a purpose, there was a point in my service where they wouldn’t let us carry pocket knives (I would estimate at least 50% of Marines have a pocket knife, of at least 3.5 inches in length). I still carried. Fuck that reg.

  2. I don’t know what my H would do without his. if he’s got his wallet in his pocket, you can bet that’s right there in the other pocket, it’s a life saver. Whenever I’m in a jam, there he is with his pocketknife, and a small smirk on his face..I think it makes him feel proud to be on the ready at all times lol

  3. My ex-husband is a Marine and I attended several Marine Corps Ball’s with him. What a party they are!! And yes, we had a Marine Corps wedding! Yup, I got gently swatted on my bottom on my way out of the church & down the aisle. While the marriage didn’t last, unfortunately, these many years later friends and family people still comment on what unique and striking ceremony it was. Thanks for bringing up a pleasant memory!

  4. I have to be honest and admit I have never attended a Marine Corps Ball. I did however attend a few Battalion Balls (held in in Australia for the 5/7 Unit in the Army – they were previously combined)

    It’s unlike anything I have ever experienced and honestly, I’m not missing them… lol

    The times I attended I observed a whole lot of alcohol consumption, fights, distressed wives, girlfriends, fiances and vomit!

    Sadly my partner was an alcoholic and although there were some wonderful times in the 6 years we were together, I consistently spent much of it anticipating Unit celebratory occasions with trepidation. #Nightmare

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