On this episode of “Having a Bipolar Spouse”…

I figured it was about time I updated everybody on having a bipolar spouse, since this blog is kinda about being married to someone who is bipolar.

Well, I think that I’ve compensated for things that trigger what I’ll call negative feelings. As I think about the things I do to facilitate and comfortable environment for bRaving, I would think that good husbands do the same things; sadly I fear that many husbands do not.

So here is a list of things (off the top of my head) that I do:
-look and listen to her for indications that something is “wrong”

-provide comedic relief in the form of funny pictures from the internet and random statements that she finds humorous now, but not several years ago when we got married

-provide relief by massage

-provide relief by helping her organize thoughts and plans

-provide relief by giving her space and time to be alone, or do whatever she wants

-provide relief by loving her and not leaving

This isn’t an exhaustive list, just some of the more important ones. I’m sure she would say there is more, and I’m sure there s, but this is a good start. Most of these are generally effortless, I don’t have to think about them.

3 responses to “On this episode of “Having a Bipolar Spouse”…

  1. Great list! My boyfriend has gotten really good at helping me deal with my bipolar symptoms over the last six years and many of the things you listed he had also realized helps! It is really great that you’ve been so supportive, thanks for sharing this!

      • Sure! Lately he’s been able to keep his cell phone on at work (he has a desk job) so when I am having a big meltdown I can call him for 2-3 minutes and he can talk me down. Normally I would call my therapist or crisis line, but explaining my situation usually makes me more anxious and can make things worse -whereas my boyfriend knows what’s going on and can calm me down almost immediately. Obviously I only try to do this in an emergency (I don’t want to be disruptive) but it has helped curb several big meltdowns.
        I experience psychosis during mixed episodes and can become delusional or hallucinate, believing people are trying to kill me. Sometimes I feel like my boyfriend is trying to kill me, and we both learned quickly that in these situations he shouldn’t try to comfort me physically (like hugging) because I find his actions threatening. Instead he stands or sits casually without reaching toward me and just talks about what is going on. From there we formulate a plan, but he keeps his distance (and keeps the dog away from me).
        Most of all, he doesn’t try to make me feel guilty when I am not able to do things like cook dinner.

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